Twenty-six

I can't see very far past my nose during this journey. That's not to say that my nose is in the air, rather I am choosing to look at the small sections. Not the big picture. The big picture is far too overwhelming and downright intimidating. Each step will add up and that is all I feel I need to focus on. Being able to focus on now also helps me learn to love the little things that change and have changed. For example: Everyday I jog a little bit more and it becomes easier to get in control of my breathing and it happens much faster now. Or I can tie my shoes and paint my toenails without having to hold my breath for long periods of time. And when I come up from doing that I don't see stars. I can't wait for other things to come easier!
So because I can only look a short distance ahead, my goal is to lose 8 pounds by my 26th birthday on August 16, 2012. If I get down exactly 8 pounds, I will have lost my age in weight...26!!! If more comes off, believe you me, I won't complain, but 8 pounds is what I am going to focus on.
I know this goal is more than achievable. My creativity is really going to have to come into play. I'm going to have to push myself just a little bit more everyday, try new exercizes, monitor my food intake, keep drinking lots of water and get plenty of good rest.
That negative voice in my head has proven to be a liar. The "I can't" has been beaten to a pulp. The "I will! I can! I did!" is gaining strength along with my body everyday. Facing my fears and "kissing fear on the mouth" has really been one of the biggest parts to conquer. I'm not saying I'm there yet and that there won't be times that that voice escapes from its prison. I am saying that I don't take kindly to bullies (that includes real life bullies and those in my head) and I won't let my fear defeat me. I've always been told the best way to get rid of a bully is to approach it directly. I intend to.
My question is...What scares you?

Fears are educated into us, and can, if we wish, be educated out.
Karl Augustus Menninger

I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.
Frank Herbert